Month: September 2023

Mental Health Monday – September 11th

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Today is one of those days that needs some extra quiet.

I drove my son to work, and then sat in the car for over 30 minutes, discussing what I wanted to eat for breakfast with myself. Having not really decided, I just sat there. I knew what day it was, but it hadn’t imprinted on my mind yet. When it did, I at least understood my unexplainable melancholy.

In the interim between 2001 and today, I have met and befriended a few people who were there, in lower Manhattan when the World Trade Center fell, who were in one of the buildings when it was hit. We’ve heard stories of friends with near misses, where fate – or providence – kept them from being there that day, and others who found their way home, ghost-like.

I have pangs of guilt, feeling the strong feelings of Nine-Eleven when I wasn’t physically there, but in the ensuing years, I have come to accept and be at one with my own trauma. No, I wasn’t in attendance, but I had been affected more than a previous tourist, visiting once or twice. This was my home. Both of my parents were from the Bronx. I was born in the Bronx and grew up in Queens and on Long Island. At the time of the attacks, we had just returned from visiting my parents and my mother-in-law the day before, crossing the Throgs Neck Bridge, pointing out the New York City skyline to our four-year-old son. We viewed that sight not twenty-four hours before, the same perfect blue sky guiding our way north.

I resent out of state politicians using 9/11 as their fundraising, their inspo-porn, trauma-porn, and call to arms that they have no right to.

For more than a year after, when I traveled on our local highway to the state capital, I would shudder at the sight of a plane flying overhead, sinking lower and lower in the sky as it descended to the airport runway that I was passing. Our house is in the flight path of two small, local airports, and every time a plane flew low, I would have a visceral reaction. I felt that these reactions and feelings were not mine to have – I wasn’t there!

But in a way, I was.

This was my home. These were my people.

And I’ve decided to own my pain and my trauma of that day.

That’s my mental health Monday suggestion this week: don’t let others tell you how to feel. Only you know how you feel, and you should let yourself feel the things. It’s possible that the feelings can be too much, but if that’s the case, seek out a professional. Talking to someone who is a professional can do wonders for your mental health, not only today, but any day.

Have a peaceful, blessed, quiet, tea-filled day.

❤

Friday Food. Samosa.

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We were staying in a small town outside of Belfast, in Northern Ireland. This was in 2017. It was our last night, and our cousins, who were hosting us had to tend to an emergency in Donegal, and so we were left to our own devices after their taking care of us so diligently, including feeding our brood of five. My husband had been adhering to a policy (and continues to do so) that he termed TSN – try something new – and with this in mind, we discovered a restaurant in town with Istanbul in the name, and chose a sampler of different fried foods that arrived in a pizza box. It was similar to a combo appetizer you would order at a restaurant.

This was my first time having a samosa. It is triangular, but not flat; three-dimensional, but not a pyramid. It is filled with, I didn’t know what then, but it was delicious. I have come to learn that they are usually filled with potatoes, peas, and spices.

My next taste of a samosa was at an interfaith Iftar I was invited to. Again, very delicious.

I’ve had various types of samosa, including a Thai version, which is yummy, although it has a softer outside.

While we were recently on vacation in Canada, we discovered and rediscovered a whole world of Indian, and southeast Asian foods, including butter chicken, naan, momo, as well as samosas. What I hadn’t expected was to see a sign in a mall food court (Pita Lite) in St. Catherine’s that offered samosas for $1.75 each. It came with a spicy tamarind sauce. (I did try it, but it was too spicy for me.)

I was so excited that I dug deep into my change purse for the exact amount, and sat at a table, waiting both for my family and to let this piping hot snack cool a bit. It didn’t matter – I still burned my tongue a little. And to be honest, it was well worth it.

When we returned to the States, and visited our local mall, I was not surprised but still disappointed to see that a simple samosa snack had not come here while we were away enjoying it. Perhaps, one day, but I can still savor the memory.

(c)2023

A Deserted Island

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I was watching The Shuttlepod Show, hosted by Star Trek alums, Connor Trineer and Dominic Keating. It’s a conversational show where they invite and talk to a guest for an hour or so, usually also a Star Trek alum. I’ve seen several, and enjoyed them. There is insight into the actors, behind the scenes, and the world of Star Trek, past, present, and future.
Recently, they had on Star Trek: Voyager’s Garrett Wang, and in a segment I had never seen before, Connor Trineer asked him a desert/deserted island question about what he’d bring with him.

There were six categories, although for books, you’re already given the religious text of your choice and the complete works of Shakespeare. I thought this was a great thought experiment as well as a terrific writing prompt, and so I share it with you, with credit and thanks given to Connor for the inspiration.

What one ____(1-6)______ would you bring with you on the desert island to occupy your time, for all time?

1. Book
2. Food
3. Author
4. Composer/Musician
5. Dessert
6. Plus a bonus item

Be creative, have fun, and happy Star Trek Day.

Inspire. September.

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Sometimes an inspiration takes on many forms and has many hands to form it.

The pictures below are a couple of my visit (pilgrimage, I suppose it could be called) to the Canadian National Shrine of St. Kateri Tekakwitha. I had been trying to visit here for several years. I was hampered from visiting due to their pandemic closure, and then I thought I wouldn’t be able to again this year because their opening hours did not coincide with our vacation plans.

My husband rectified that by suggesting our return a couple of weeks after our vacation to visit the shrine. And so, I was able to fulfill my desire to see the final resting place of St. Kateri Tekakwitha. This was my final stop in seeking out Kateri’s footsteps, and it was a beautiful experience that I will share in time.

In the meantime, enjoy these photos that do not do the site justice:

St. Francis Xavier Mission Church.
Kahnawake, Quebec, Canada.
(c)2023
The Altar.
(c)2023
Looking from the altar to the entrance of the church.
(c)2023
Tomb of St. Kateri Tekakwitha that holds her relics.
(c)2023

Mental Health Monday – One Thing

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I’m not sure about you, but this week, or partial week, set between the end of vacation and the beginning of school is always a tough one for me. This year is especially bittersweet as it is my daughter’s senior year of high school; the little one; the baby. Our vacation days were all messed up this year, coming earlier in the month than usual due to a commitment I made, the college school schedule, and the closing days of a shrine that I wanted to visit (see tomorrow’s Inspire post for more on this).

As I mentioned on Friday, September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. It can be a burden to our mental health to constantly be reminded that we are not alone, we are enough, if in crisis, call 988. For some, it truly is a reminder of our worth and a valuable resource. For others, on the lower spectrum of suicidal thoughts, it can come across as trite, another checklist to get through to be called an ally.

You never know who you’re reaching, and so we keep reaching out. I hope the readers will take it with the compassion and empathy in which it is offered.

For today’s Mental Health Monday, find one thing.

Just one thing.

It can be something that makes you think; something that makes you feel; makes you laugh.

It can be as simple as a fortune cookie fortune that you’ve been carrying around in your pocket or in the cup holder of your car.

It can be a business card sized card with a mantra on it or a smiley face.

It can be a flower petal or a leaf that drifted in your open window.

Whatever it is, give this one thing a little time; focus on it in a mind-wandering way.

Journal, doodle, listen to music along with this one thing. Or do nothing at all.

There is no wrong way to do your one thing this week.

Suicide Prevention Awareness Month

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Today begins Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, and I thought this would be a good time for a couple of reminders.

  1. You are loved.
  2. You are not alone.
  3. You are enough.
  4. Take a moment to create your mental health toolbox to help you through those tough times.
  5. Speak to a professional when you need to. Talk therapy is very effective.
  6. In crisis, remember the new Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988

Mental Health Monday returns for September on Labor Day.