Twenty-five Years

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A lot can happen in twenty-five years, and a lot does happen.

Twenty-five years ago, I had one child, one year away from kindergarten, and two parents. We lived in an apartment at street level. That preschooler is now grown at 29 with two younger siblings and my parents are gone. We own a house in a nice, suburban neighborhood with good schools and safe streets.

Twenty-five years and one day ago, our little family was driving home from visiting our parents on Long Island. September 10th was a bright, shiny day with the bluest-blue skies that you could hope for. Our apartment phone wasn’t working and the next morning Verizon would be coming bright and early; no sleeping in after our visit and travel. I opened our front door to let them in, and I turned on the television – The Today Show. There was sadness, perplexion, but no shock, not yet. A plane flew into the World Trade Center. It happens. Small planes have accidents in the city. Watching the other plane fly in was mouth-dropping, heart-stopping, panic-inducing, and the shock and the fear did not leave for months, probably not for more than a year. I was two hundred miles away and still, if a plane flew overhead, I cringed. A car backfiring would make me jump. I stopped making eye contact with anyone. I just wanted to be home. I did the shopping, I did what I was supposed to do, and I went home. In the women’s magazines they called it nesting, and we were definitely nesting. Cooking, cleaning, household projects. Years later, we did it again with the pandemic, but this one, this time of home and family was deeper. While the pandemic was fearful and unpredictable, 2001 was the same but more.

In the after 9/11 times, I tried not to watch the coverage. I would listen to witness stories. But that was the extent of it. We weren’t in the city on that day, but our friends were. I grew up in that city. My husband and I visited the World Trade Center. He had co-workers there, two of whom didn’t come home that day.

Some years I write about today and some I honor it privately. The first anniversary we kept our new kindergartner home and took him to the State Museum in Albany to see their 9/11 exhibit. This year, I’m at work and preparing for the New Year, the Rosh Hashanah holiday that begins tonight. In my writing, on anything, I usually wait until it comes to me – the thought, the first word or phrase, the focus. Nothing came, and I thought it would be another quiet year, one of contemplation, prayer, and stillness.

And then, we went on vacation at the end of August. We traveled to Canada – Quebec and Ontario. We’d been to most of the places before, since my own childhood. I had family in Toronto and if I recall correctly, an aunt in Thunder Bay. I still have some cousins there, all from my paternal grandfather’s side of the family. On this visit, I was astounded by the sheer number of Canadian flags on buildings, on houses, in shop windows, and believe it or not, on a few cars. Truly, in the fifty years I’ve traveled there, this is just not a thing that Canadians do. Here in the States, you could practically fall over the number of American flags flown. That’s not something they do in Canada. But they’ve never been treated the way they’ve been treated recently by our government. We were even met by one very, very, v-e-r-y angry Canadian.

This piece will not be a diatribe or a discussion on the shortsighted, contemptuous, and mean-spirited foreign policy our current government is following, and I certainly won’t mention names, so I decided instead to talk about books.

After 9/11, hundreds of books came out – think pieces, witness accounts, documentary photos, everything you could think of. I bought exactly two books about 9/11 in the past twenty-five years, both of them within the first two years, maybe three.

The first book is Fireboat: The Heroic Adventures of the John J. Harvey by Maira Kalman. The reason I bought this book is that my son and husband rode on this boat exactly one month before the attacks. It was heading down the Hudson and they were invited on board with some others and rode it from the harbor in Troy, NY to Albany where they disembarked onto the USS Slater. I think I’ve told that story before.

The second one I bought was Jim DeFede’s The Day the World Came to Town. I don’t know if it’s still in print (it is!), but it was the story of the morning and following days after 9/11 when all air traffic ground to a halt. The United States was closed. Planes were still in the air. They couldn’t come here.

They were diverted and landed in Gander. Gander was already the place where emergencies came to land when crossing the Atlantic. Gander, a small town of about 11,000 people on the island of Newfoundland was where thirty-eight jets landed carrying about 7000 people, just about half of Gander’s population. At first, they were expected to remain on the planes and they did so for over twenty hours, but after security checks, the people of Gander opened their public buildings and took in who they could. When there was more people than space in those buildings, they opened up their private homes. Passengers covered every square foot of Gander. They were given food, shelter, clothing, and comfort. The passengers remained in Gander for five days.

The Canadians in Gander refused to take any money. They were just doing what they do, taking care of neighbors. Opening their homes, their selves to the not-strangers, but new friends who needed them. It was a beautiful act in the shadow of terror. It was extraordinary in its ordinariness.

We have always had a special relationship with Canada. We need to nurture it, we need to repair it because losing it is unthinkable, unbearable, unneighborly. We cannot let that be forgotten. They are more than our friends and allies; they are our neighbors and family.

They have always stood with us, and we should not forget that, ever.

To Celebrate

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I’ve struggled since Memorial Day thinking, debating with and challenging myself on whether or not I want to celebrate the two hundred fiftieth anniversary of the founding of this country. I was raised to be proud of the United States. My parents raised me to be respectful of the flag, to stand for the pledge and the National Anthem, my duty to vote and to sit on a jury, and to believe that this is the greatest country. It has that potential certainly. It could be. We are in a place where anything’s possible. If I moved to Japan, I couldn’t become Japanese, but anyone can move here and become an American. That used to be a good thing.

Let’s be honest: as much as I’m in denial, I won’t be here in fifty years to celebrate the tricentennial and it saddens me that so much of this celebration has been taken away from us. I look at the waving flags and I feel nothing but ill. Sadness of what we’ve been reduced to.

But I’m not going to let a group of corrupt racists take this week away from me. I’m not. I left my flags up for Memorial Day (as they should be flown for our fallen), and then took them down a week later. I’ve decided to put them up again for the next two weeks. I think it’s important to celebrate our past, to acknowledge and reconcile the bad, to praise the good, and to hope for the better, and for a better future filled with joy and equality, laughter and hope, so that’s what I am going to do.

Everyday this week, I’ll have something else to share, from heartfelt to commercial, consumer bandwagons, and of course, baseball…

and apple pie.

Anne Frank

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I grew up in a Jewish household in a Jewish neighborhood visiting grandmothers and cousins and observing holidays with the typical complaints of a child with too much energy to sit still and do nothing while the parents were at temple. We were often told to quiet it down while all of the kids were doing their best (or not so best) in the temple parking lot. I can still feel the heat on my face that came up from the asphalt even on these early fall days. These were my formative years. I lived this way in Queens, New York until I was ten, almost eleven when we moved to Long Island, which was different as night was to day.

While we moved east, my cousins moved south to Florida, and while we wrote often, we were bereft [th] of each other’s company which had been constant practically since I was born. My grandmother was their aunt, and my Bubbe (great-grandmother) was their grandmother. My new neighborhood was more diverse than Bayside’s Oakland Gardens, although our immediate neighbor was Jewish and he had a mixed accent of Eastern European and the Yiddish language. We traveled into Queens to see my grandmother, and into the Bronx to visit my uncle.

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100 Days…And Going

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Yesterday was the hundredth day of my 100-Day Project. That would presume that I have completed one hundred prompts. Well…

Overall, I’m really proud of what I’ve accomplished and would highly recommend Suleika Jaouad’s book, The Book Of Alchemy: A Creative Practice For an Inspired Life. The essays she wrote and the ones she shared range from the funny, tales of life to the poignant heartbreaking twists and turns of life. Some resonated and some did not as all things in life can do. Some prompts were more difficult than others. I don’t recall which one, but I believe there was one that I completely noped out of, and went in a different direction. I laughed, I cried, and each prompt made me think and feel and wonder.

Today, I am on prompt 94 so I am nearly done with the book and I have decided to take two days with these last ten. I want the book to continue on. Last weekend, I was on a writing retreat with my wonderful writing group, and so my concentration was on that writing and reading, plotting and planning. I felt no guilt at all. Once Monday arrived, I got back in the flow of Alchemy.

The most recent one was a prompt about enchanted places and what makes them enchanted. There’s more to it than that, but that’s what I took away. I set that one aside on Friday, and went to one of my enchanted places: The Kateri Shrine in Fonda, New York. I spent about an hour there walking around, photographing flowers and chapels, signs and statues, and yes, writing. There was one picnic table with benches there and I sat there with my kindle and my keyboard and got out just over nine hundred words. There will be edits and additions.

After about day twenty, I made a plan to return to the prompts, and that is my plan for the summer between writing my book and keeping my deadlines, publishing on my website, and perhaps a Substack or two.
When all one hundred are completed sometime in the next week or so, I will read the end pages of the book, the contributors notes and bios, and then I plan to go back to what I’ve written and add, edit, flesh out the ones that have somewhere else to go. After all, that is what being a writer is: writing, writing, writing.

For the most part, I wrote my responses to the prompts on the same day I read them. I kept track of the subjects, categories, and word counts, although sometimes I feel as though word counts are arbitrary. I am stretching these last few out, savoring them. Even though I plan to go back to the ones written since the beginning of the project, there is nothing like doing something for the first time.

On some I added thoughts and paragraphs to the writing. Sometimes, I included ideas that were floating around formlessly in my head. Each prompt had so much potential, and it really is a wonder how many different ideas and inspirations I could get from one prompt. It’s glorious to see what others come up with from the same prompt as well.

Tangentially related, in the memoir class I’ve been taking this season, a book was recommended to me that I’ve begun, and it has given me the framework for my next book once St. Kateri’s Shrines (not the actual title) is completed. I had been struggling with that subject and how to approach it for years, and so seeing this one random inspiration is a gift to myself.

And now, on to prompt #94!

March Inspires

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Mass and Adoration in Lent.
(c)2026

Last Thursday I attended mass. After some questions and wanderings, I found the side chapel which I hadn’t known existed at this church. I wasn’t late, but I was barely on time. The way the room was set up I didn’t know how the communion would go, but I put that aside.

This was my first visit since I made the commitment to attend Thursday mass throughout Lent. You can see the photos above that show you the spareness of the Lenten decor, and it was lovely to be in the simplicity with no distractions from the Word.

When mass was over, something unexpected happened. The monstrance was set up for adoration. I hadn’t known that there was an adoration period, and since I had no other plans, I thought I would stay, and what I found was peace. Contentment. In this moment, this unexpected comfort and full of comfortable sitting.

Some who stayed were sitting, some were reading, all praying.

I was sitting with prayer and some were also; some of us were just sitting with Jesus.

This was the second time in a year that I found myself accidentally at adoration, and it seems to me that in these two times, this is where I was meant to be. I could feel the presence of the holy spirit. It didn’t occur to me to leave, and so I stayed, and when I felt the call end, I went about my day.

I also wondered: could I read my current book? Reading a book, sitting side by side with Him.

In quiet.

In peace.

In contentment.

Election Connection: Jesse Jackson (1941-2026)

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When I was in college, so somewhere between 1984 and 1988, I saw Jesse Jackson give a speech. We were in some kind of gymnasium with metal folding chairs, and I can still picture him up at the podium, I was about halfway back. I feel like he was wearing a grey suit. His hair was not as big as in the picture but it also wasn’t close-cropped as in later years. He did have a mustache. I remember a raised fist.

I didn’t remember him as the civil rights icon that he was even then. I only knew him as the Presidential candidate, and I was ready to vote for him.

At this time in my life, I was a pre-law, political science major, and to say I was a political junkie would be an understatement. Every morning I’d wake up and put on the television to the one station we could get in the dorms – ABC for the news. It would be on constantly. Before the 24 hour cable news, my TV was news, news, news even if I wasn’t in the room.

Seeing Jesse Jackson in person was exciting. The room was electric, and his preacher’s voice carried. I was all in. (The photo I chose above is not recent. I wanted one to reflect how he may have looked when I saw him in person.)

He didn’t become president but I think he was more influential as an activist than as a politician. He was one of the OG civil rights heroes, next to John Lewis, Ralph Abernathy, James Lawson, Thurgood Marshall, Martin Luther King, Jr, often literally.

Rest in peace, Rev. Jesse Jackson. In peace and in power.

Obituary from the LA Times

Wikipedia from Rev. Jackson’s 1984 presidential campaign

The Next 86 Days

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Fourteen days ago, I started a 100 Day Project. I had no intention when I was setting my goals for 2026 to do something like this. I can usually do about a week in a row, maybe, or one day a week for maybe two months, I will write everyday but I won’t stick with this type of commitment. I’m not sure why. I love to sit down in front of my computer or my Kindle. At the moment, I’ve just finished lunch at Cracker Barrel and this is the third thing I’ve written. I know that part of that is that I’ve started this 100 Day Project. It has really motivated me to write and to write more.

This is also a book rec. A couple of years ago, I read Suleika Jaouad’s memoir Between Two Kingdoms. I had heard of the book through an interview with Jon Batiste, Stephen Colbert’s former band leader, and I thought this book would be fun. The author had leukemia and went through treatment, and reading it was not fun. I am under no illusion that it wasn’t fun for her either. It was an emotional roller coaster. I felt it, obviously not the trauma and debilitating circumstances of cancer, but Suleika’s writing drew me in, and she will draw you in. I think the best writers keep you in suspense. As she told her story, knowing that she must have survived – she wrote the book, she got married – through the book, I still wondered if she was okay. That is the mark of a great writer.

When I saw this book on an email advert from Indigo Book store in Canada, I was intrigued. I recognized her name right away, and when I read the title (without the subtitle), I thought it was fiction. I learned very quickly that it wasn’t. It was a journey, one that I take myself on often but this was a nice guide to take me on that journey through other people’s thoughts, ideas, and inspirations. I borrowed the book from the e-library and started reading.

I have been reading for two weeks now, and the book is due. I gave myself ground rules, and I will share them with you, but there are no real rules until you make them for yourself. They have to work for you or else what’s the point?

In choosing to follow the guides in the book, I soon realized that it can be done in any medium. It is not restrictive to writing, even though that is my vocation. Even if the prompt directs you to write, you should do whatever feels creative to you. Again, for me that’s writing, but I also like to sketch and for one of the past fourteen prompts, there was a mind map activity. I made the mind map. I could have easily listed the items, but the mind map is a visual way of writing. I’ve done that before (and taught them to other writers by the name word webs). There was a ten image prompt that could easily be done with a camera or a sketchbook. I wrote a vignette for ten images in my life, which was very much like a writing prompt i received from my regular writing group about choosing five nouns and writing about them.

If you’re the kind of reader looking for the numbers, I have written every day using the prompts in this book for a total of 6730 words.

That’s an average of about 480 words a day. Not great, but also 480 more a day than I would have done otherwise.

I am still keeping up on my blog writing, on my book writing, on my writing groups prompts, and my work writing.

My rules are simple.

  1. No looking ahead.
  2. Read each section of the chapter on the day.
  3. Once I read that day’s essay and prompt, I usually copy/paste the prompt onto a new document. Each day is saved as Day #, so at the end of one hundred days I will have one hundred documents.
  4. I decided that I would do this entire project on my kindle. No going back and forth to journals or paper and not on my computer. One thing that ensures is that I can always do it – my kindle is always with me.
  5. Then I write. My rule about the writing is that I do not wait until later. If I don’t have time to write, then I don’t read the essay. I read the essay, the prompt, and I write on the prompt. Then I keep writing until I’m done. It’s different each day. Some days are 250 words, and some are over 700. I don’t do the word count until I’m finished.
  6. I do a spell check before I save the document.
  7. I haven’t gone back to re-read, but that’s not so much a rule as something I’ve simply not done. I know that some of these will be revisited and used as the basis for  longer writing.

I haven’t decided if I’ll share any of the writing, perhaps in a few more days.

Now that my library loan has expired, I wasted no time in buying my own copy of The Book of Alchemy: A Creative Practice for an Inspired Life by Suleika Jaouod. I didn’t want to miss any of the days and I wanted to keep to the 100 days in a row.

If anyone’s interested in joining me on this project, let me know.

Perhaps there’s some way we can work on this together. I’m open to ideas and suggestions.

Robert Redford (1936-2025)

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When I was in high school, I went through periods of binge-watching different movies with the same actor to see their filmography, although I didn’t call it that at the time.

  • Errol Flynn
  • Katharine Hepburn
  • Claudette Colbert
  • Harrison Ford
  • Alan Rickman
  • Robert Redford

Of course.

Three Days on the Condor, Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid, The Sting,  All the Presidents’ Men, many others. Not just his acting but his directing, his exposure of issues. Ordinary People and Thunderheart come to mind as well as narrating the documentary, Incident at Oglala. Those last two changed my life and were major contributions to my activism.

Looking at him onscreen and in still images was like staring into the sun, or a shining star – too bright to look at too long or too intently, but not able to look away either. He was more than handsome. He was magnificent. As California Governor Gavin Newsom said, he was a son of California, and it was obvious from his full head of blond hair, deep tan, active, outdoorsy lifestyle. He was wholesome. His whole face showed what was on the inside, and it made you want to move closer, not away.

As people online said, I think we all thought Robert Redford was here forever, not quite immortal, but not mortal either. I recently re-watched All the Presidents’ Men, and I plan to watch it again this weekend. I’ll also watch Sneakers for the first time as that was recommended today as well.

As someone said earlier, we all hope that when we pass, we’ll be talked about and remembered as we are remembering Robert Redford today.

Obituary

Happy 20th Birthday, Supernatural!

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Photo of T-shirt. (c)2025

On Saturday, the fandom celebrated the twentieth anniversary of the premiere of Supernatural. The show ended its run five years ago, and its popularity has only grown with meet & greets, conventions, and the fans following the actors on to new projects, continuing to buy the merch and donating to worthy causes through Stands and Random Acts!

I had toyed with the idea of posting a reflection on Saturday, the day of the anniversary, but I also thought I would actually approach the anniversary the way I approached my watching of the original series: late.

I did not come to the fandom when it premiered in 2005, but during its hiatus on its way to the second half of its seventh season. I had a lot of catching up to do, and I made it, just barely when the show returned with the second half, and I’ve been with them ever since.

I brought my teenage daughter along for the ride and that has also been an exciting dimension to this fandom as well.

I’ve written before how I’ve never been big on horror, and Supernatural felt like horror, so I avoided it. Luckily for me, my friend wrote up a trigger list for each episode so I could go in with my eyes open and make the choices as I went along. I’ve seen every episode except Bugs and I don’t plan on seeing that one even now.

I was also in the middle of a new diagnosis of severe depression, and Supernatural was really one of the things that kept me in a solid place as we adjusted medication, found a therapist, and began writing as therapy. Supernatural was a big part of that recovery, and continued to be a go-to when I need something in the background to keep my mind still. I’ll talk more about this later today when I publish today’s Mental Health Monday, coming this afternoon.

The Pilot episode gives a good introduction to the characters and their journey; however, my first episode was The French Mistake with breaks all of the fourth walls, and really pulled me into the fandom before it pulled me into the series. If you’re already familiar with the actors and their characters, The French Mistake is a fun episode that still moves the story forward.

So, happy birthday Supernatural! Twenty years since the premiere is a milestone, as is the fifteen years on the air! Let’s go: we’ve got work to do.