reflection

Robert Redford (1936-2025)

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When I was in high school, I went through periods of binge-watching different movies with the same actor to see their filmography, although I didn’t call it that at the time.

  • Errol Flynn
  • Katharine Hepburn
  • Claudette Colbert
  • Harrison Ford
  • Alan Rickman
  • Robert Redford

Of course.

Three Days on the Condor, Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid, The Sting,  All the Presidents’ Men, many others. Not just his acting but his directing, his exposure of issues. Ordinary People and Thunderheart come to mind as well as narrating the documentary, Incident at Oglala. Those last two changed my life and were major contributions to my activism.

Looking at him onscreen and in still images was like staring into the sun, or a shining star – too bright to look at too long or too intently, but not able to look away either. He was more than handsome. He was magnificent. As California Governor Gavin Newsom said, he was a son of California, and it was obvious from his full head of blond hair, deep tan, active, outdoorsy lifestyle. He was wholesome. His whole face showed what was on the inside, and it made you want to move closer, not away.

As people online said, I think we all thought Robert Redford was here forever, not quite immortal, but not mortal either. I recently re-watched All the Presidents’ Men, and I plan to watch it again this weekend. I’ll also watch Sneakers for the first time as that was recommended today as well.

As someone said earlier, we all hope that when we pass, we’ll be talked about and remembered as we are remembering Robert Redford today.

Obituary

Happy 20th Birthday, Supernatural!

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Photo of T-shirt. (c)2025

On Saturday, the fandom celebrated the twentieth anniversary of the premiere of Supernatural. The show ended its run five years ago, and its popularity has only grown with meet & greets, conventions, and the fans following the actors on to new projects, continuing to buy the merch and donating to worthy causes through Stands and Random Acts!

I had toyed with the idea of posting a reflection on Saturday, the day of the anniversary, but I also thought I would actually approach the anniversary the way I approached my watching of the original series: late.

I did not come to the fandom when it premiered in 2005, but during its hiatus on its way to the second half of its seventh season. I had a lot of catching up to do, and I made it, just barely when the show returned with the second half, and I’ve been with them ever since.

I brought my teenage daughter along for the ride and that has also been an exciting dimension to this fandom as well.

I’ve written before how I’ve never been big on horror, and Supernatural felt like horror, so I avoided it. Luckily for me, my friend wrote up a trigger list for each episode so I could go in with my eyes open and make the choices as I went along. I’ve seen every episode except Bugs and I don’t plan on seeing that one even now.

I was also in the middle of a new diagnosis of severe depression, and Supernatural was really one of the things that kept me in a solid place as we adjusted medication, found a therapist, and began writing as therapy. Supernatural was a big part of that recovery, and continued to be a go-to when I need something in the background to keep my mind still. I’ll talk more about this later today when I publish today’s Mental Health Monday, coming this afternoon.

The Pilot episode gives a good introduction to the characters and their journey; however, my first episode was The French Mistake with breaks all of the fourth walls, and really pulled me into the fandom before it pulled me into the series. If you’re already familiar with the actors and their characters, The French Mistake is a fun episode that still moves the story forward.

So, happy birthday Supernatural! Twenty years since the premiere is a milestone, as is the fifteen years on the air! Let’s go: we’ve got work to do.

Retreat Reflection

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At the beginning of the month, I went on a retreat. At the time, I didn’t know that I’d be having surgery a little more than a week later, and I was in blissful ignorance that my tendon was simply pulled and needed some extra care and a walking boot. I was wrong. That will be a post for tomorrow. Today is to walk through the weekend that was a journey of self-discovery through the concept of Original Goodness.

It was wonderful.

I discovered a morning prayer that I’ve tried to pray and contemplate on most mornings. I have also gone to sleep using breath work: breathe in “acceptance;” breathe out “surrender.” It has a calming effect on my bedtime ritual.

The journaling exercises were really thought provoking and I did some artwork as well.

I enjoyed the company, and it made me look forward to my next retreat in a few weeks with my writing group.

I created a map that began with “rest” and continued through other thoughts like “be,” “create,” and “let it go” among other gems tossed out to think about.

That weekend has stayed with me, and will continue to stay with me as I go back and re-read what I journaled and the notes I took, and perhaps lead me in a new direction or even in the same direction with possibly new focus, determination, and motivation.

Take this weekend and use the time for your own journey of self-discovery. Take the notes, smell the flowers, write the words, sketch the doodles.

Be at peace.

Mental Health [Monday] Tuesday

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As I’ve done for previous Mental Health Mondays, this Monday got away from me. And a day late doesn’t end the world. I think that is an important lesson to remember when things in our days get out of hand. I had three things to do yesterday and realized early on that one of them would need to be abandoned. That came with some regret, but I cannot bi-locate (yet) so choices were made. The day was still a time crunch and a lot of driving, but while I didn’t’ get something posted for yesterday, I did remain steadfast in my awareness of my mental health. I knew that I’d need to eat throughout the day. I knew that I’d need to sort out what was for dinner and get the groceries. I knew I needed to plan for the rest of the week, both at home and at work since we’re all “losing” a day to my son’s college commencement. My brother is taking the day off from work to be there, and my daughter is splitting her shift so she can be there and stay for lunch. I should get a cake, but if not, it will be okay since he’s already planning on going to the movies that night with friends. The point is, we all have stuff that comes up in the middle of our carefully laid plans, and how we adapt to them is the basis for how our mental health goes that day and possibly some of the days that follow.

It’s okay to take a break.

We watched Rogue One last night after finishing the Andor series last week, and I only spent time at the very beginning thinking about all the work I needed to be doing on my computer including this post, but I let it go.

Sometimes you can let it go.

And it’s also okay to not be okay.

Take a break.

Read a book.

Watch a movie.

Listen to music.

Stare into space.

It’s all good. Or it will be.

Mental Health Monday – Challenges

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Yesterday was a challenge for many of us: those that have challenging mothers, challenging children, mothers who are absent whether by a choice or by death, and everyone, I mean everyone is wishing any woman in sight a ‘happy mother’s day,’ whether they need to or not. It is the society we live in where every day must mean something extra – Mexican food on Cinco de Mayo, Bosses’ Day, Nurses’ Week, Wednesday is Hump Day. Each day has a bit more to include and sometimes exclude.

So how do we cope when we are challenged by these days?

I try to go with the flow. It’s not always easy. My family asks what I want to do on my day. Where do I want to eat? What do I want them to get me? What do I want to do, all day, every minute of this special, special day?

And I’m grateful, I truly am that they want to actually spend time with me, but on the other hand, I’m the cruise director all year. Every day. I’d like a day off. You know what I like. Just pick a place. Just get a token thing. Sign a card. I really don’t have any requirements. I mean, we like cake, so I’d like a cake. A cupcake is good, too. I love cupcakes. Vanilla cupcake. Vanilla frosting. Rainbow sprinkles. Seriously, I’m boring and easy.

And if you’re not boring, your family knows that too.

If you’re not into the whole eating out thing, order in. Get a pizza.

If you’re not into celebrating, stay home and read a book.

Whatever it is that makes you happy or at least content, make your wishes known.

And if it’s not perfect, they tried…take yourself out on Monday…and don’t tell anyone.

I had an enjoyable Mother’s Day, and when I got irritated, I removed myself from the situation. I walked away. Not in a tantrum, not in a snit, I just left and let the rest of them communicate.

No one’s fault, but my Monday, this morning, was not great. I had a misstep on the last step, the one I fell off two years ago and broke two ribs. I stayed upright this time and slammed myself into the front door. That was actually the plan to keep me upright, and it worked. I did twist my knee, but it’s feeling better as the day goes on.

Then I set up a pickup order at Starbucks. I like their blackberry sage refresher, and I’d like it before they get rid of it for the season. I also got my boss a cherry chai that she had been admiring. I went to pick it up. They didn’t have it. It turned out that I put the order in at a different Starbucks about seven miles away, and in the opposite direction from work.

I texted my boss, apologizing, and saying I’d be late.

Picked up the order, a lovely woman held the door open for me (kudos to her kindness), and I get to work…and my boss can’t have caffeine.

I was then told it is a full moon.

And a Monday.

I always think of Adam West’s Batman on days like this: Sometimes, you just can’t get rid of a bomb.

*shrug*

Let’s hope the rest of the day floats along happily or at least doesn’t sink messily.

A Mama and her Fine Feathered Babys. (c)2025

Bring Them Home

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It’s the first night of Passover. The matzo is broken, the chicken is eaten, the food is away. The kitchen is cleaned and families are still missing their people; still held hostage after over 500 days.

But we have hope

We have faith

We have our Collective

and together today as Moses said then, “Let. My. People. Go.”

I wrote this on the first night of Passover, which was Saturday. That was also the night that someone tried to burn the Pennsylvania Governor’s house down, and as we’ve heard since had planned to beat the Governor with a sledgehammer. That is not what this is about; sadly, we will have many more instances of antisemitism to speak out.

Inspired & Inspiring – Writing Retreat Reflection

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This weekend I went on a much anticipated writing retreat with three writing colleagues. We have been meeting every two weeks for the past year, and the amount of feedback, suggestions, and camaraderie we’ve each received has been a glorious blessing.

We each had our own private bedroom as we shared other accommodations and a small conference room for meeting together and writing.

We interspersed our own writing with writing prompts and exercises to jump start our creativity and we enjoyed snacks, candy, and company and remarkably we each got quite a lot done on our individual projects.

As the “host” I had several goodies planned and I just loved both aspects of hosting and of participating.

The shared space worked out amazingly well, and we have tentatively scheduled another retreat in the fall.

Moving forward from this weekend, I have some goals set that need to be formally set down with specific timelines:

• Sample Book Cover
• Book Title Ideas
• Chapter Headers (each chapter needs):
          – Titles
          – Picture, sketch, or quotation
          – Fictional narrative of this aspect of Kateri’s life, especially related to the shrines
• Timeline both of the formal governments & of Kateri’s life
• Questions to be answered

I’m looking forward to the rest of the week, planning, meeting again on Zoom, and focusing on the direction of my book.

Happy Writing to All of Us!

Caption for Photo Collage above:

  1. Our reserved dining table for the weekend
  2. A beautiful necklace one of my colleagues gave me
  3. Protest sign created for April 5th Hands Off protest that three of our group went to
  4. Chocolate chip scone & cup of hot, black tea with milk
  5. Our conference room where we met, laughed, read, and wrote

Intentions-Inspirations-Resolutions

round button colored green with three sentences: 1. Ankose 2. Everything is connected 3. Tout est relie
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For readers who have been here for awhile, I rarely if ever declare or think about New Year’s Resolutions. That changes this year. After the election, I’ve been inundated with lies and misinformation, not to mention the focus on stupidity rather than real news, and I am damn sick of it. That led me to think about my life and my writing.

I may have already written about my new job, but I started working in October, and it is the kind of place that feeds my soul. I have never had a job like this before, and every day is a joy to be there, and that allows that joy to follow me home. It’s been a good couple of months.

Obviously, I’m disappointed (understatement) about the election. I hope we can get through the next two years, and use the midterm elections to return to sanity. My first Election Connection of the new year will appear in this space next Tuesday.

As I mentioned yesterday, I am really proud of my series writing, and those will continue. In addition to Election Connection, there will be more Mental Health Monday, monthly Inspired and Friday Food posts, and I’m hoping for a return to Penny Prompts – the writing prompts based on Louise Penny’s writing and her Armand Gamache mystery series.

Those are both my intentions and my inspirations and I hope to find more throughout the year. You will find more of my new year’s thoughts below the cut.

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End of Year Wrap Up

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In some ways, saying goodbye to 2024 is bittersweet. It is both a relief and a sadness. I’m still wearing my Harns/Walz bracelets and yearn for what might have been. Nothing was going to be perfect, but I have no doubt that it would have been better.

I spent yesterday looking back at this website, traveling from December all the way back to January to find which posts stood out to me. some were great; Some were not so great, but they all propelled my writing forward. A few of my favorites are linked below for you to also look back on. Tomorrow, I’ll begin with my intentions and actual resolutions for the New Year.

After 25 or so years home with my kids, I now have a job outside the house that I truly love. I never expected this to happen, and I’m so glad that the time was right, both for me and the place.

I have a good path forward for my book. I’m organizing the research and the photos, and I will also be presenting a program in the summer on St. Kateri’s Journey and her life.

A Look Back:

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