I try to post these Mental Health Mondays during the awareness months, like mental health awareness in May and suicide prevention awareness now in September, and throughout the year when I’m feeling that I need some reminders and tips to keep moving forward.
In this month of suicide prevention, I do post more about mental health than suicide prevention or ideation. That is mostly because despite the desperate need that brings some of us to the brink of suicide there is also the mental health aspect that affects us all in one way or another, at various times, whether we are officially diagnosed or in therapy for other reasons. We all have those moments that life is just too much.
My suicide ideation came at a difficult time in my life, full of stress and downturns, and other despairs. Or did the stress, downturns, and despair come out because of the suicidal thoughts. Mental health is inextricably linked and often mental health and chemical imbalances result in physical health deteriorating.
I came through it.
You can also come through it.
Some days are better than others, but when the day begins again, each tomorrow is a new day, a new chance to start again, a new opportunity to be better and to make it better, whatever that ‘it’ is in your life.
I’d love to hear some of the ways that you make it through to the next day and begin again.
For some of my ways, look back at the mentalhealthmonday tag; search it in the search box on the left-hand sidebar or click on the tag below.
Let’s help each other. Getting through the tough times is the first step, and every step after that is a success.
Last week, I mentioned in my list to put together your mental health toolbox. Each tool will be different for each person. We may use the same techniques sometimes, but we may not use them for the same reasons. One of the reasons I like to share how I cope is to show how much it changes from when the tool is needed.
First, here is the link to a previous post about Coping Skills and a Toolbox: Coping Skills Toolbox. I found this on Tumblr many years ago, and have found it to be a great resource on its own as well as foundational for my own added tools.
Second, this is a graphic from my friend’s facebook:
(c)2025
There are so many ways we can rest, and so many different ways we need to rest that it’s important to have that reminder. I know I often think I’m tired, but my rest isn’t helpful. Perhaps, I’m focusing on the wrong rest.
Third, my old standby is watching Supernatural. Supernatural came into my life at a time of heavy crisis, and it is a comfort show for me. What is your one comfort that you can always return to?
Share any tools that work for you, so we can help each other through the big and little events that turn us upside down and around.
I feel twisted like a pretzel, trying to get my goals organized and sorted and focus on the many things that need to be done.
Overall, I think I’ve done okay. The one success I can see is not hitting the snooze button. I’m still pressing snooze but not as often. This is definitely a good thing.
I’ve been working on my presentation for next week, and the good news is that all of the work for that is also useful for my book.
I do need to crack down on my Cursillo responsibilities though.
I need to reschedule a couple of medical appointments in the next few weeks, and I need to plan our family vacation.
To start, let me remind you of the plan for July and the Mental Health Check in:
If you’re interested, drop me an email (kbwriting11@gmail.com) with your first name (or what you’d like to be called) and your email, and we’ll do a little email newsletter once a week, just for the people interested.
There is a sign-up, but it is free to join. Let’s see where this takes us, and see if we can support each other in our struggles, whatever they are.
You’ve had twenty hours or so to think about your personal goals for the next four weeks. I’ve thought about mine as well as what I can offer in the weekly emails that will benefit all of us.
I have my first week’s list ready to go with three main items of focus:
1. Book and Program
In two weeks, I am presenting a program on the same topic as my book. I need to finish the slide show, print out the information index cards, prepare the handouts, and try to keep my anxiety from getting the better of me. I’ve wanted to do this, but I also would rather not.
2. Work
Next week is a huge week at work, and Friday;’s a holiday and I’m off for my husband’s birthday, so tomorrow is the day to get as much done for up to Tuesday’s events. I can do this!
3. Cursillo responsibilities
I need to balance the checkbook, attend the July Ultreya, and mail out reimbursement checks.
So, there are the lists. The main goal is to get from now to Tuesday, and hopefully be far enough ahead that I can set the goals for the next week.
I suggested scheduled breaks, and that is something I need to remember. Often if I’m in the middle of a project, whether at home or at work, I won’t stop until it’s finished. This is not healthy.
I’m going to use my phone’s alarms to my advantage rather than a crutch. For starters, no snooze for a week. That includes waking alarms and medicine reminders.
I have struggled throughout June with publishing on this site. I don’t know if I’m too busy, if it’s writer’s block, if there’s just nothing to say – well, there’s plenty to say, but how to say it without insulting, offending, condescending, and pissing people off, that is the question.
But ultimately the real question is how do I evolve my writing while I’m doing other types of writing and work.
I went and returned on a research trip to Montreal, spent the day on Sunday at the Kanatsiohareke Strawberry Festival, this weekend is my husband;s birthday and the next weekend is St. Kateri’s feast day when I will spend the day at the Kateri Shrine, both for pleasure and business. We are planning a family vacation which circumstances caused it to be longer than anyone wants, which sounds great until you have to live it, and I’m about to begin working full-time, and yet, the house will not take care of itself. I say that as someone who has an enormous amount of help from their spouse.
I also fucked up all three of the taxes I filed for myself and two of my kids. I’ve decided to pay someone next year, but how to explain my filing system? *shrug* I’ve got about six months to figure that out!
It’s all still so stressful. Health issues abound. A conflict with a medical receptionist is coming to a head. Bills are piling up, and for the third time I’ve sent paperwork for financial assistance from a group that I need to continue to be nice to.
Some days it’s a hundred degrees, and others it’s sixty-five, and that fluctuation doesn’t help anyone.
I put my first draft together and it’s a lot less than what I thought it was.
So, how do I turn this mental health mountain back into a molehill?
I’m not sure.
And I haven’t even addressed the ongoing dystopian and autocratic nightmare that this country is turning itself into. It’s scary for most of us, but as someone with young adult children and who, with most of their family is Jewish, these are very scary times; times I never expected to witness outside of a history book.
How to Cope?
I’m going to go back to my old standard of lists.
Lists for home.
Lists for writing.
Lists for work.
Lists for kids.
I’m going to give myself some scheduled breaks. Even at work. I can breathe. I can read. I can play a word game on my Kindle. I can visit Starbucks, and I can take a walk to the mailbox.
Any other suggestions welcome.
How about you?
How will you get things done while maintaining your mental health?
How will you focus when your mind only wants to drift? What can you do to get through the days ahead?
Before our family vacation, I am going on retreat in about four weeks or so. Between now and then, and then once after the retreat, I would like to check-in once a week. Let’s say on Wednesday. I’ll post something public, but I’d also like to do something different. If you’re interested, drop me an email (kbwriting11@gmail.com) with your first name (or what you’d like to be called) and your email, and we’ll do a little email newsletter once a week, just for the people interested.
There is a sign-up, but it is free to join. Let’s see where this takes us, and see if we can support each other in our struggles, whatever they are.
For the next twenty or so hours, think about your personal goals for the next four weeks. I’ll think about mine, and also what I can offer in these weekly emails that will benefit all of us.
As I’ve done for previous Mental Health Mondays, this Monday got away from me. And a day late doesn’t end the world. I think that is an important lesson to remember when things in our days get out of hand. I had three things to do yesterday and realized early on that one of them would need to be abandoned. That came with some regret, but I cannot bi-locate (yet) so choices were made. The day was still a time crunch and a lot of driving, but while I didn’t’ get something posted for yesterday, I did remain steadfast in my awareness of my mental health. I knew that I’d need to eat throughout the day. I knew that I’d need to sort out what was for dinner and get the groceries. I knew I needed to plan for the rest of the week, both at home and at work since we’re all “losing” a day to my son’s college commencement. My brother is taking the day off from work to be there, and my daughter is splitting her shift so she can be there and stay for lunch. I should get a cake, but if not, it will be okay since he’s already planning on going to the movies that night with friends. The point is, we all have stuff that comes up in the middle of our carefully laid plans, and how we adapt to them is the basis for how our mental health goes that day and possibly some of the days that follow.
It’s okay to take a break.
We watched Rogue One last night after finishing the Andor series last week, and I only spent time at the very beginning thinking about all the work I needed to be doing on my computer including this post, but I let it go.
Yesterday was a challenge for many of us: those that have challenging mothers, challenging children, mothers who are absent whether by a choice or by death, and everyone, I mean everyone is wishing any woman in sight a ‘happy mother’s day,’ whether they need to or not. It is the society we live in where every day must mean something extra – Mexican food on Cinco de Mayo, Bosses’ Day, Nurses’ Week, Wednesday is Hump Day. Each day has a bit more to include and sometimes exclude.
So how do we cope when we are challenged by these days?
I try to go with the flow. It’s not always easy. My family asks what I want to do on my day. Where do I want to eat? What do I want them to get me? What do I want to do, all day, every minute of this special, special day?
And I’m grateful, I truly am that they want to actually spend time with me, but on the other hand, I’m the cruise director all year. Every day. I’d like a day off. You know what I like. Just pick a place. Just get a token thing. Sign a card. I really don’t have any requirements. I mean, we like cake, so I’d like a cake. A cupcake is good, too. I love cupcakes. Vanilla cupcake. Vanilla frosting. Rainbow sprinkles. Seriously, I’m boring and easy.
And if you’re not boring, your family knows that too.
If you’re not into the whole eating out thing, order in. Get a pizza.
If you’re not into celebrating, stay home and read a book.
Whatever it is that makes you happy or at least content, make your wishes known.
And if it’s not perfect, they tried…take yourself out on Monday…and don’t tell anyone.
I had an enjoyable Mother’s Day, and when I got irritated, I removed myself from the situation. I walked away. Not in a tantrum, not in a snit, I just left and let the rest of them communicate.
No one’s fault, but my Monday, this morning, was not great. I had a misstep on the last step, the one I fell off two years ago and broke two ribs. I stayed upright this time and slammed myself into the front door. That was actually the plan to keep me upright, and it worked. I did twist my knee, but it’s feeling better as the day goes on.
Then I set up a pickup order at Starbucks. I like their blackberry sage refresher, and I’d like it before they get rid of it for the season. I also got my boss a cherry chai that she had been admiring. I went to pick it up. They didn’t have it. It turned out that I put the order in at a different Starbucks about seven miles away, and in the opposite direction from work.
I texted my boss, apologizing, and saying I’d be late.
Picked up the order, a lovely woman held the door open for me (kudos to her kindness), and I get to work…and my boss can’t have caffeine.
I was then told it is a full moon.
And a Monday.
I always think of Adam West’s Batman on days like this: Sometimes, you just can’t get rid of a bomb.
*shrug*
Let’s hope the rest of the day floats along happily or at least doesn’t sink messily.
I made a small graphic thinking about what helps me focus when things get to be too much.
(c)2025
I began to think about where I begin my mental health awareness. How do I become self-aware and how do I keep on track and moving forward?
These four squares came to me in simple ways. They are both simple and entrenched in my way of being. They are my touchstones. They are not necessarily yours. You will find your own touchstones and ways to cope with whatever comes up daily.
In a similar vein, I’d like to share an exercise that I did on a recent retreat with the Dominican Sisters. The main topic was time and how time affects our priorities and ways we can use to change them and shift where we spend our time. While this retreat wasn’t geared towards mental health and awareness of mental health, time plays an important role in how we perceive our mental health challenges and push and pull until we’re being intentional with our time and our mental health, emphasis on health.
Below I explain the exercise, and hope to come back to it in a couple of weeks. I plan to think my own choices and perhaps begin again.
Today is the first of May. It is the first day of Mental Health Awareness Month.
Mental Health Awareness Month has several facets. The two that I find most helpful are
make the outside world aware of what mental health is, what struggles we all face, what can be more difficult struggles some of us face, and letting go of the stigma, encouraging talk and sharing coping tools.
Make yourself aware of your own mental health. Where do you struggle? What are some of your coping plans and tools for getting through a rough patch? Or even just an annoyingly mediocre patch? What’s in your toolbox that still works for you?
In other words, assess yourself, share your struggles, challenges, and successes and be there for others in explaining mental health, coping, and the ongoing recovery. Be there for yourself and for others. Some days you can only do one of those, and that’s okay.
Beginning on Monday, I will be publishing a weekly column called Mental Health Monday. I have done many of these throughout the previous several years. Search through the tags to see older but still valuable approaches and coping tools. Sometimes, we forget and rereading and reestablishing some of them again is a valuable tool.
Reassessment in recovery, I find, is ongoing.
None of the strategies and coping tools that I post this month are intended to suggest you forego medication alternatives. I take medication – both prescription and supplemental, all with my doctor’s input and approval. I wouldn’t be here without medication. Don’t let anyone shame you for taking care of yourself. Just like getting from point A to point B, there are many different roads to travel. Very rarely is there just one way, and one (or more) of them is the right way for you. Changing direction is okay, too.
Recognizing a better way and adapting.
Just as a counter has a take a penny, leave a penny dish, in mental health, take a strategy, leave a strategy.
I’ve always thought of my depression, anxiety, and mental health struggles as a journey – a period of recovery with no tangible cure; only moving forward in my mental health, my mental space, my mental recovery.
This is my path and sometimes we cross paths. This is us crossing paths and offering insight, motivation, and ways to keep getting through.
It’s hard to believe that this is the first MHM of the new year. And it’s the second week of February. It goes without saying that we probably could have used a mental health check and break long before today with everything going on in the world.
This Administration is beyond appalling, and the spiderweb of fissions emanating out from the center of it will have lasting ramifications long after he and his corrupt associates are gone, dead, and buried.
We think the government is so big, but the reality is that while we can trim the fate from excessive spending, there are reasons for some of it.
One example: USAID. Funds ceased. Employees laid off or furloughed. Those people won’t be able to pay bills, rent, mortgages. Those companies will then not be able to pay their bills. And what about where the funds go? Kids across the globe will not receive schooling, medicine, safe water to drink, healthy food to eat. Shelter. And even if you don’t care about the world’s children, what about the Midwest farmers who will lose billions of dollars in lost revenue because USAID is no longer paying them for their products. Those people have their own kids to feed, bills to pay, and businesses to run. But the richest man in the world cut off their funding with complicit Republicans in Congress and the President.
Now, reading this, it wasn’t supposed to be a political post; it’s supposed to be about your (and my) mental health, but here we are.
Even when the topic isn’t the dystopia that’s enveloping us in the US and that we’re projecting on our allies and neighbors, it comes down to what is sabotaging our mental health.
For my family, while money is still a touchy subject and issue for us, I am now working. Part-time. We’ve made the commitment not to spend my paycheck except on overdue bills, medical bills that insurance doesn’t cover, and saving for our family vacation. So far, except for Christmas and other holidays, we’re managing as planned.
Our family is no different in many ways than many of those reading it.
How are you coping with the world at large so far this year? How are you coping with the little things that writ large because when we’re struggling there all big things?
5 Things I’ve Done Since the New Year
Breathe. Always keep breathng.
Journal. Write it down. Even if you eventually toss it in the trash, get it out.
Take a Break. When I drove my son to work this morning, I had two hours until my next appointment/commitment. I went to Starbucks for an hour and enjoyed my new favorite drink. (And of course, listening to their perfect playlist!)
Meditate/Contemplate. In whatever way you find comfortable. For some of us that’s sitting in nature. For others, it’s power walking around the mall. Some of us pray, and some of us watch mindless television.
Social Media. Whether that’s consuming more or less, free blocking the people who sabotage your mental health and mental safety. Decide how much you want in your life. (Of course, this will change over time – you’ll take in more, you’ll avoid more, depending on life’s circumstances, and that’s ok.)
Griffins and Ginger Snaps 