Change is Coming

Fall has always been my time for starting over and resolutions. I’m starting here. 🙂

Beginning next week, I’m going to make some format changes and additions. Some pages may be inaccessible for a short time.

I’m going to start five regular weekly posts. I know from the likes and the views that several readers are also writers, so on Mondays I will post a prompt and share the free-writing fun. I know I’m more motivated when I have my workshop prompts to work with instead of coming up with my own all the time.

I will also have a photo post, weekly quotation, and a recommendation post.

In addition to those planned posts, I will continue to blog and publish my writings as well as photographs and art and timely activities.

I will also be changing the categories and tags, and hopefully simplifying them.

I welcome suggestions and feedback.

Sept 22 (Luke 8, Proverbs 3) Reflection

There were several things in Monday’s Mass that struck at me with familiarity. The first was the Reading: Proverbs 3:27-34, in particularly verse 27:

“Refuse no one the good on which he has a claim when it is in your power to do it for him.”

And the Gospel of Luke 8: 16-18

¹⁶“Now no one after lighting a lamp covers it over with a container, or puts it under a bed; but he puts it on a lampstand, so that those who come in may see the light.¹⁷For nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that will not be known and come to light.¹⁸So take care how you listen; for whoever has, to him more shall be given; and whoever does not have, even what he^[e]thinks he has shall be taken away from him.”

How many reminders in the Scriptures are there for helping your neighbor? And we all know that it isn’t always literal neighbor, but a euphemism for fellow man or rather mankind.

If you have the ability, as Proverbs says you should help without questioning yourself, your neighbor’s motives or needs or whether or not you feel like it. It can be just as hard to ask for that person or more than it is to go without.

And Luke. How many passages do we read that have to do with light shining in the darkness? Following the well-lit path? Showing someone else your own light?

The light is so many things – our lives, our faith, the brightness in a child’s eyes, the glow of the sun’s rays through stained glass as it skitters across a wooden or stone floor. When I first came into the church, I couldn’t help but notice the different lights: the skylight, the small stained glass windows, the large Blessed Mother in the front, the large windowed cross in the back and of course the candles and how each light reflected itself, but also shown differently in the shadows; to be more nuanced than simply light and dark.

I saw Christ in the light – the proverbial awakening of my soul through the spirit.

I have come full circle through most of the passages. It won’t be complete until the third year of Gospels, but for some of the readings I’ve heard them before, and they still jump out at me as I recognize their impact on my heart.

Monday’s Antiphon was the first one I ever read, and that was a random picking of a page back when:

I am the salvation of the people, says the Lord. Should they cry to me in any distress, I will hear them, and I will be their Lord for ever.

He did.

And He is.

E4K2014 is Just Around the Corner

This will be my second year participating in Random Acts’ Endure 4 Kindness. It is a two day event of marathoning an activity. As I did last year, this year I will also be writing.

I sat at the table, laptop in hand so to speak and wrote – free writes to prompts – for eleven hours. My plan in 2014 is to aim for an even twelve hours.

Last year, I wrote for 11 straight hours for a total of 15 separate pieces and 12,363 words. I hope to surpass both of these in October.

I will be taking pledges through CrowdRise. For myself, I will be donating $10 regardless of additional donations. I’d like to be able to give Random Acts more than that. If you are interested in donating/pledging (any amount) in support of my attempted endurance, I welcome it.

This is my CrowdRise page: https://www.crowdrise.com/endure4kindness/fundraiser/karenbond

I have some ideas to keep me busy for twelve hours, buy your prompts are always welcome. Email me at kbwriting11@gmail.com

Spread the word, and for more information about Random Acts and the work they do, visit their website at therandomact.org.

This E4K event will take place over the course of the weekend of October 18 and 19, 2014.

Sept 21 (Matthew 20) Gospel Reflection

Since beginning my Catholic education that led to my recent baptism this past Easter, I have continually been astonished at how much I’ve learned that I already believed. I’ve never had any formal teaching in any Christian religion. I had attended a handful of Masses with friends or for their weddings, a christening or three, and I’ve had one or two who believed in evangelizing and brought me pamphlets and materials to read and consider.

One of the things I always had a problem with was Judgment Day and whether or not and who would make it into Heaven. My belief had been, and I apologize for the flippancy in which it sounds, but my belief was always that even if I didn’t believe, if Jesus was real, He would forgive my ignorance. He would take me into his flock because that’s what he does. It’s His thing.

Honestly, I tried to avoid this conversation because it does sound disrespectful and I’d never meant it in a tongue-sticking-out way, but in my head, it was just a logical assumption.

Over the course of the last year (it is almost exactly a year since I began in the program), I have had the privilege of taking several classes and workshops. I also ask a lot of questions, and I am so happy to say that they are always answered. My questioning is welcome and I find that when I can ask anything, it is easier to allow myself to think and decide what it is that I believe within the religious framework that I’ve been seeking.

In addition to daily Mass for the past two years, I’ve gone to lectures on Matthew’s Gospel by a local priest, and one of the things he expressed was this feeling, this statement that whenever you come to Christ, you are accepted. You can be the last one in the door, and still you are welcome. (He also had a few things to say about Judgment Day which I also believed in my heart since forever, but that is another essay.)

In hearing Sunday’s Gospel (Matthew 20: 1-16), it reaffirmed that and what I’d always thought.

If I have made a conscientious choice with no malice, and I was mistaken, not through hubris, but through faith and reasoning, I would not be punished for my opinion. Jesus wasn’t that kind of a person. (Again, in my Jewish faith, I thought of Jesus as a person, not divine; this has changed in the last two years.)

He would not turn me away.

I’m not the last one in the door, but I have still found this to be true. I have been welcomed; not only by Jesus and His example, but by his representatives in the church and parish community.

Here is an excerpt from the New American Bible of Matthew 20: 1-16 that made me smile on Sunday:

20 “For the kingdom of heaven is like ^[a]a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. ²When he had agreed with the laborers for a^[b]denarius for the day, he sent them into his vineyard. ³And he went out about the ^[c]third hour and saw others standing idle in the market place; ⁴and to those he said, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right I will give you.’ And so they went. ⁵Again he went out about the ^[d]sixth and the ninth hour, and did ^[e]the same thing. ⁶And about the^[f]eleventh hour he went out and found others standing around; and he *said to them, ‘Why have you been standing here idle all day long?’ ⁷They *said to him, ‘Because no one hired us.’ He *said to them, ‘You go into the vineyard too.’

⁸“When evening came, the ^[g]owner of the vineyard *said to his foreman, ‘Call the laborers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last group to the first.’ ⁹When those hired about the eleventh hour came, each one received a^[h]denarius. ¹⁰When those hired first came, they thought that they would receive more; ^[i]but each of them also received a denarius. ¹¹When they received it, they grumbled at the landowner, ¹²saying, ‘These last men have worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden and the scorching heat of the day.’ ¹³But he answered and said to one of them, ‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong; did you not agree with me for a denarius? ¹⁴Take what is yours and go, but I wish to give to this last man the same as to you. ¹⁵Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with what is my own? Or is your eye ^[j]envious because I am^[k]generous?’ ¹⁶So the last shall be first, and the first last.”

Mixed Feelings (Rosh Hashanah)

I have mixed feelings about Rosh Hashanah this year.

I had planned on observing it and keeping the kids home from school on the first day of the holiday, but it wasn’t on my calendar and I’ve made a committment to drive on of the elderly ladies to our memoir workshop, which is on Thursday (the first day of the holiday). I thought of maybe observing the second day instead of the first, but if I make a nice holiday dinner on Thursday, my husband won’t be home because he’s going to the high school for back to school night.

I may have to split the difference and do parts of each day. Have the dinner tomorrow night, go the workshop and then come home and continue with my own observance.

The liturgical year also starts in the fall, closer to November I think, I’d have to check, but that just reinforces my beliefs that becoming Catholic is an extension of my Jewish life, especially if you look at the New Testament as a part II, then my being Catholic after being Jewish is also a part II, a next chapter.

Once you are aware of all of the holidays, you can truly see the overlap, Rosh Hashanah, Passover, etc. I actually gave my take on Passover/The Last Supper to one of the presenters at the Spring Enrichment. It’s nice to be able to contribute with something I kind of know.

It’s also one of the reasons that I think joining the adult enrichment ministry is a good fit for me.

E4K Art

I know my drawings aren’t much but I enjoy the process of doing them.

This is the badge I made for my E4K this year. I should have a proper post about the event on Monday.

GISHWHES 2014 Wrap Up

For those who don’t know, GISHWHES is the Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen with money going to the non-profit, Random Acts. My next project with them is Endure4Kindness, which I will post about separately.

In my opinion Gishwhes 2014 was a huge success. I had a great time! I had a great team. We got a lot done. I am definitely happy with my individual items. The ones I picked but then didn’t do were picked up and done so much better than I would have done them it makes me glad I gave up on those rather than doing something sucky.

When all was said and done, I completed ten items for a total of 396 points and a cost of $14.11, which is 61 points more and $14 less than last year’s hunt. Definitely a good thing.

I did video, which I hate, but I did it anyway. I did another Twitter. It seems as though I am the twitter expert despite not using it very much anymore. And now I have an alarm clock and I am Orlando Jones.

My teammates hailed from California, New Jersey, Georgia, New York, Utah, New Zealand, Israel, and Ireland. Of the six people I already knew, the newest friend I had known for five years and the oldest friend on the team I’ve known for thirty-three years give or take a couple (honestly, can’t remember if it was middle school or high school but either way a shit ton of years).

I made business sized cards for this year to explain Gishwhes but let’s be frank; there really is no explaining it. Maybe next year, I’ll have a better 30 second commercial and do a double sided card. Shrug. I have about a year to think about it.

The items I completed were

to request a FOIA about my parents
take video of myself in front of a local landmark (I used the state capitol)
a photo montage of when I grow up, guest starring my daughter
my photo with a black and white sign for the team
an homage and tribute to the rubber glove inventor
share a true act of kindness story done for me for the Random Acts website
the species hybridization of Jared Mooselecki (of course! Who else?!)
Jam Stand with the kids
Cajole a published sci-fi author to write a 140 word story
and the Orlando Jones Twitter.

I would really love it if the Jam Stand gets into the Coffee Table Book. I went to great lengths to kiss up to Misha in it, including making our Jam Stand a West Collins franchise complete with West’s picture and offering free popcorn with every plate of pasta and jam sauce. Of course the popcorn was the West Collins special variety made by Jet Puff! My kids, without any prompting from me, donned mustaches. They are definitely good sports. Last year, they worked for the post office. This year pasta and jam sauce. Who knows what Misha will ask of them next year?!

I’m still kind of in that Gishwhes frame of mind despite it ending more than a month ago. In fact, I’m about to make a sock monkey hat for almost no reason at all.

I’ve been reviewing items for the Coffee Table Book. So far, I’ve completed four, which is three more than I did last year. It’s so awesome to see how other people interpreted the prompts/items.

I’ve reviewed: Elopus vs. Wooster, Popcorn Monster, Five Headed Monster doing yard work, and Museum Quality Display of Dishware, which I have to say that some of them were truly museum quality.

However, Misha, I am not a Gisher and I am not sorry. I am a Gishwhesian and if that makes me an outlaw, I’m sure there’s a country song written about it. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but I came into this hunt a Gishwhesian and I will leave it the same way, wearing a magnificent costume in front of a landmark with a rainbow farting unicorn and my hand up an elopus puppet’s something or other.

Gishwhesian.

Gisher is just a fad anyway. It’ll be gone in less than a year. You mark my words.

It is impossible to calculate the amount of absonome that goes on during Gishwhes week. It’s like a giant family reunion when your family is half committed to an insane asylum and the other half should be. I signed up for a group doing a two week version of Gishwhes-lite, but I’m not motivated. It’s a great idea, but there’s something special about THE WEEK. The stress. The insomnia. The insanity. The together that we are all at the same time doing variations on the same things. It is unique and glorious and brilliant.

Not to mention that when Grandma is mud wrestling and Dad is wearing a French maid’s outfit, it is time to rethink your life choices.

For many of us, it is a time to step out of our comfort zones, think outside of the box we put ourselves into the rest of the year, even outside of the atmosphere of our planet Earth; one day perhaps outside of the solar system, but for now, if each year brings us a little further out, the better it is for the world and the people of that world.

Most importantly, there can never be too much kindness and compassion and Gishwhes and its parents, Misha and Random Acts remind us how little it takes out of our day to make someone else’s better.

With that in mind, it makes me a little sad but I would like to touch on my disappointment with some people; not anyone on my team or anyone I know directly. I’ve been in a couple of different groups where they talk about Gishwhes and help each other as much as is allowed. They’re good networking groups.

I did feel, however, that a lot of people have lost the true meaning of Gishwhes and it’s certainly not to meet Misha Collins (although that would be a bonus). I saw a lot of complaining, a lot of whining about not understanding an item when that item was mostly about interpretation. It’s less about the skill and more about artistic vision. I saw some shortcuts. For example, people used their bone marrow cards from prior to Gishwhes and other items that were already made when the purpose of that particular item is to get more people on the list. (ETA: After posting this, I received a message from someone whose team used existing bone marrow donor cards. Scroll down to the end to read their perspective. It was something that I hadn’t considered.)

Also, the point, as I understand it is to create new art, do good things. In fact, at the end of the hunt, the Gish FB posted, “We create, therefore, we live.”

Everyone should be enjoying themselves above everything else that they are doing and every team won’t get every item, and that’s okay. F-U-N.

I was also disappointed with how much ShatnerHate there was and that bothered me a lot. People found William Shatner to be annoying, brash, braggadocios and having the ego the size of Texas (or the Northwest Territories if you want to go with his Canadian roots).

And water is wet.

He’s fucking William Shatner!

You don’t have to like him. Don’t pay any attention to him if that’s the case. He’s 80 years old; he’s been a celebrity since the 1960s, before many of those naysayers were born. He’s not going to change now. Love him or hate him, but stop hating on him publicly in the name of Gishwhes. That is the complete opposite of what Gishwhes is all about.

Misha is the messenger; not the message. Take the week of Gishwhes and continue all year. Donate blood. Visit the elderly. Mud wrestle Grandma. Pack boxes of food at food pantries and churches. Shovel your neighbor’s snow. Pull weeds. You can even wear a sock monkey on your head. Or a real monkey (**remember, do no harm, including to primates**). Zookeepers are welcome to make the world a better place, too.

Until next year, restock the kale; gather the plaid and figure out what rhymes with squirrel.

P.S. I just ran this through spell check and apparently Wooster is in my dictionary. What the hell, Misha?!

(ETA: As a member a team that submitted existing donor cards, I wanted to let you know there was a very good reason at least in our case Our team is mostly older folks that have various health problems/disabilities that keep us from donating marrow & the ONLY people on our team that could already had cards, so rather than waste the registry’s time with applications that weren’t going anywhere we submitted the existing cards to show that we support the cause but couldn’t actively apply.)

Remembrance

Most people who’ve read me for a while know that this season is kind of a difficult one for me. Fall, the most perfect season and the most difficult; until the next difficult time comes around.

A lot of people have an especially hard time today. I was very lucky, and my friends and family were very lucky, but it was still traumatic for me in its own way.

I’ve also recently found out that two newish friends have their own difficult memories of 9/11 and so I think of them today a little extra than I normally do.

I usually write something for today – a memory, a feeling, but this morning, I just wanted quiet. I prayed the rosary, and I posted my picture of the firefighters. I have that same picture on a pin that I wear, but I didn’t wear it today. I think of the 343 and then today in my workshop, our free write prompt was the pros and cons of cell phones. (Our theme this semester is nature vs. technology.) I wrote this cute little blurb, about two hundred or so words, but then as I finished it with a humorous bit, another little part came to me and I’ll share that excerpt with you here:

Actually today is a good day to remember the role of cell phones and technology played – the ones that worked and the ones that didn’t.

The information black hole on an airplane over Pennsylvania that was then opened up to the passengers through their cell phones, giving them precious moments to plan and to say goodbye.

I spent that day thirteen years ago on my cell phone, calling and re-calling. There is nothing like a cell phone for speed dial.

Hope and despair in the palm of your hand.

I hope today is peaceful and quiet for you as we remember those people lost thirteen years ago in our own ways. Today I try to seek the warm blanket of comfortable things – reading, some writing, some prayer and other things that keep me moving forward. I hope you have your own path to peace.

Suicide Prevention Awareness

Thursday will be one month since Robin Williams killed himself. Some of his battles over the years happened in the public eye, but the shock and surprise at his suicide shows the true iceberg effect of depression, bi-polar, and other related mental illnesses that it is speculated that he had. No one can know what that last straw was for him.

This is a struggle that countless people combat in their daily lives and for many it is hard to know from day to day what will work and what will not, including things that have worked in the past as a positive coping tool. Another issue that becomes problematic is that far too often we ignore mental illness in favor of physical illness because mental struggles are less obvious and we’re expected to hide them as if it’s a character flaw rather than a genuine illness. It’s no wonder that it is often called the invisible illness. For those of us spending part of our days faking it, it can often take all we have to get through one hour of one day.

One of the ways we can show support for those in the throes of mental health issues is to be vocal in our support; let the people around us know that we are here no matter what. A general statement and/or attitude can take the pressure off of those who can’t get through, who feel alone, who aren’t ready to come out as suicidal or in need of help.

If they know instinctively that we are here for them, they may feel comfortable enough to ask for that help. Or maybe just to talk.

You will never know what you had done that will change someone’s mind about suicide, but I guarantee that they will remember it and they will appreciate it and if you unwittingly give someone an extra day to find their way, this is a good thing.

This week is Suicide Prevention Awareness Week. Awareness for those who are not suicidal to know the signs and the resources available; to know what to say and how to show support to someone who needs it, but may not realize how close they are to the precipice until it’s too late.

Awareness is also for the suicidal, those at the very edge to learn that they are not alone, never alone and where they can go for help when they’re ready; even a simple phone conversation to alleviate the pressure.

I’d like to take a moment to mention LGBT youth. These kids are at higher risk for abuse and suicide as well as homelessness and assault. This is especially true of trans youth. Being young, it is often not realized that their problems seem gigantic in comparison and they do not feel that this will go away or that these feelings are only temporary. We need to be there to encourage them and stand by them in whatever capacity that they want us to.

The Trevor Project specializes in helping LGBT youth and is an amazing resource for others who want to support those kids and teenagers.

They can be reached toll-free at 1-866-488-7386 or online at thetrevorproject.org

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-TALK or suicidepreventionlifeline.org

For people feeling that suicide is their only way out, here are a couple of other resources to assist you:

IMAlive.org – an online crisis network with trained volunteers available to chat 24/7

SAFE (Self-Abuse Finally Ends): 800-DONT-CUT (366-8288) – informational hotline, educational resources, and advice about intervention.

August Month in Review

Well, overall it looks like August sucked. Nothing like proof that your brain is in a fog. Some good things – we did our summer taste tasting (hate anchovies), went to Chuck E. Cheese to round out the summer vacation, took the family to the movies (Labor Day weekend).

Midway through the month I was able to attend a spiritual retreat with about fifteen other folks, directed by Brother Mickey McGrath. I will write more about this later on, so for now I will just say that I don’t draw, and I did draw, and I continue to draw. I don’t kid myself: I’m not an artist, but it’s not terrible, and I don’t mind sharing it. It’s an outlet for quiet contemplation that I had never considered before. I really only went for the retreat part and because I’d heard so many things about Bro. Mickey. I found so much more and am planning on attending his next retreat in February (money and scholarship pending).

My daughter and I had a Fangirls Night Out sponsored by our comic book store. There were raffles (we won Willow from Buffy!), cupcakes, a raffle and of course other like-minded fangirls. NO BOYS ALLOWED! Even the store’s owner was kicked out! It was great fun and she and I had a great time together!

My husband and I also celebrated our twentieth anniversary. With money being a problem we really couldn’t celebrate in a big way, but we decided (I thought of it – I can’t believe it, I never come up with anything good!) to go to dinner (sans kids) and a movie, like our first date. We saw Guardians of the Galaxy. I highly recommend it! Fantastic movie! And dinner was amazing. A local, rustic place with a pretty fireplace. The site has had a tavern on it since the 1700s. A nice night.

Thinking back, it’s kind of ironic that we went to Williamsburg, VA on our honeymoon when many of my fandom friends live down there now including my bf, who I obviously didn’t know back then. I think that half of them may have still been in diapers when I was there (and they were actually elsewhere). I’ve written before about Williamsburg being one of my special places from childhood. I’ve always been a history buff, and much of that came from my parents and the vacations they took us on as children, only one of them being Virginia.

I distinctly remember Williamsburg (among others) and having as much fun as we were quietly learning. Everywhere my parents took us, and later on vacations with my husband, I was always looking for and visiting the one room schoolhouses. Something about that entranced me; probably it’s Little House on the Prairie feeling.

It was neat that my husband and I chose to go there for our honeymoon: Colonial Williamsburg, Busch Gardens, shopping (one of my favorite things to do back then; now too, but we had more money back then). We rented a car, a Cougar that went 90 miles an hour if you breathed on the accelerator. We traveled the Chesapeake Bay Bridge and Tunnel, something that still makes me queasy and that I’ve sworn never to do ever, ever again. (Much like driving in Wales.) I still shudder to think at the memory of being in the tunnel for so long, under the water. Recently, I’ve been lucky (with the generosity of Andy, Jenn and my husband) to have been able to get back there to see my friends for fandom fun. I’ve talked about how I used to hate being alone, but I really enjoyed those two trips that had me traveling alone-ish, and this trip down memory lane is reminding me that I wanted to write about those travels. I’ll put it on the list.

So while the written word eluded me, I’ve been drawing and this was probably the best family summer we’ve had in a long time. I welcomed back to school, but I wasn’t counting the days (hours) like I was last year.

Don’t forget that October 18 is E4K and I will be taking pledges.

I also have a couple of things that should be completed today and tomorrow, so wish me luck for more words in September.

Word Count: 6771 (wow, that sucks)

365s: 7/31 (wow, that sucks)

Movies: Defiance seasons 1 and 2
The Birdcage
Robin Williams: Weapons of Self-Destruction
The Italian Job
Babylon 5 – season 5
Amazing Spiderman 2 – reboot
Crusade – partial season
Guardians of the Galaxy

Books: A King’s Ransom – Sharon Kay Penman
Paper Towns – John Green

Posted/Published Topics: depression, suicide, Gishwhes, medical, health, cancer, religion, spirituality, social issues, summer

WIPs topics: Retreat wrap up, Gishwhes wrap up, fan vs. fandom, memoir homework, vignettes for stuff

Griffins and Ginger Snaps

-I write, and I have a blog because of course I do-