21/52 – Moms

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Finishing out Mary’s month of May with my other mothers. We celebrated Mother’s Day. I’m the only one now. This was our first without my mother-in-law, a wonderful mother and in-law. I never understood all of those stereotypical mother in law jokes. My mother in law was no  joke. Always supportive, always kind, always welcoming. Probably would have lived another decade or more if not for the car accident. We’ll be traveling to Northern Ireland to visit her home, see where she come from, where she grew up, got her values and her skills, her independence, her enthusiasm for life.

My Mom’s birthday was yeserday. She would have been seventy-four. It’s hard to believe that she’s gone twelve years now. We used to talk every day, especially after the grandkids were born. She was an advice giver, whether wanted or needed or not. But still, taken in stride. For the most part, she stayed away from “helping” us name our second son, but was secretly pleased that we chose to name him after my father. She would like that my baby girl is named for her. I remembered her mentioning that she liked the name when we were deciding. 

Kind and generous and I learned that from her. Inherited. As well has how to make a good roast beef and pot roast, and of course, her lasagna, what most poeple would call baked ziti. Still awesome, though. Sunday bagels, too much mayo in my tuna fish, and overplanning on the little things and under planning on the big ones. 

Learning as much as teaching. But always trying to do the best, and moving forward. Being mom and remembering moms.

A Force of Nature

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My mother-in-law was a force of nature. So vivid and bright, even in the black and white world of a Northern Ireland childhood, the sun dimmed in her presence because he knew when he was beat. She didn’t wear pink; she wore fuchsia. She didn’t wear peach or salmon; she wore orange. Her red was the color of a rose or a fire engine. She had to go out and buy a black skirt to wear to my wedding. She wore it again to her daughter’s. Waste not, want not.

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