Day 5 of Lent

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Today at Mass the Church gave out these small metal crosses that fit into the palm of your hand. The Father said that they’re to remind us of Jesus’ temptation by the devil in his forty days in the desert, and for our time during Lent, whenever we’re tempted by something, we should take this cross out and look at it, hold it in our hands, turn it over, read the Scripture on the back (John 3:16) and fight through the temptation. Remember that G-d is always by our side; we just need to have faith.

It was kind of funny with what I was thinking about as he said it, and it made me realize how often my mind can wander, and how my dreams often will take me places that I’m not willing to go to when I’m awake. I also think that some of that is the stress of my house. I’ve been taking a few extra deep breaths, and I’ve been biting my tongue a bit more, but change is coming; for better or worse.

I think we must all have those moments where the grass is always greener somewhere else, and we want it – the envy and the lust and the need and the longing, not so much of what someone else has, but how much better we’d be if we had the same thing as them – that it must be so wonderful over there, but of courses, we’re only seeing what they want us to see.

Their world is different, but it can be equally difficult. We just don’t always see their forest for their trees.

There are a couple of people I’d like to trade with – take a vacation from my life and let someone else stand in for me for a while.

However, I do need to remember that I have three children, and I am their example, as poor as some days that is, so I will work on this coveting and temptation and see where I am in forty days.

2013 Mason Jar

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Mason Jar Project, 2013

Mason Jar Project, 2013

I’ve seen this around tumblr and Pinterest, and decided that it would be an interesting thing to try out. Even on my best days, I lean towards the negative (although I’d really call myself a combination of a realist and an idealist, but that’s really more complicated than it needs to be). However, with the severe depression (that I will talk about fuller as time goes on) so prevalent in my life this past year, almost to the day, I thought that a jar where I put the good things that happen throughout this year would be a positive thing for me.